The KKK (Kaimanawa Kaweka krossing)

Abstract: 4 blond mostly straight white boys cross private Maori land and fly a flag off the top of the highest peak…. The biggest problem with writing this trip report is that nothing really went wrong. We had a very capable group, relatively good weather, no injuries or complications. We just had a bloody awesome time. All I can ensure is that this report will still be more interesting than most hunting articles. 

It starts with an ambitious plan to kross from Desert Road, across the Kaimanawa and all the way out to the lakes carpark in the Kawekas in a week long mish. Getting land access for the private land and using monetary incentive to get another AUTC chap to move out car (thanks Rhett and gf), we are all go.

The first two days are highlighted with heavy snow showers while getting blown along the tops. Definitely good character building when you find you're not so waterproof. Having a rough traverse over Junction Tops, sanctuary was found in Rangitikei Hut where we crashed for most of a day. As Lucas dried his balls out in front of the fire, we debated the philosophical relationship between Lucas’s love interests and them all turning out to be more into women than they are into him.

Was a bit of a surprise waking up Monday morning to find snow down to 1000 meters. As the weather cleared up, big words like vista and cool were used to describe the scene as we climbed up to the tops. A stop at Makocracko was made, which we dubbed to be the winter name of the highest peak, Makorako (thought we were quite smart coming up with that one). A 20km push was made over Mangamingi saddle out to Boyd hut, traversing thick scrub, bloody bush layer, and making acquaintance with a half-full bottle of Sheep Dog at Mangamingi Hut. 

The rest of the trip traversing Kawekas went smoothly, experiencing snow showers and exhausting undulations. Blunt wood axes kept us more warm than the wood we chopped. Tyler's mumble rapping reached a max state while penguin dancing on top of a log. After being given 2kgs of cheese and most of our water bottles, James learnt to stop boasting about how light his bag was. I ate way too much butter causing my body to respond in a very gaseous way. We also realized how little people come this far out into the Kawekas with a lot of these very nice huts only receiving 1 or 2 groups throughout the winter months.

By the last couple of days, a plague of food repulsion had struck the group. Everyone agreed that a diet of cheese, salami, chocolate and mash potato wasn't tolerable any more and that we should get out as fast as possible. After a long traverse of the Kaweka tops, singing about Kebabs, we finally reached the car. And absolutely bee-lined it to the nearest Kebab store in Napier…